Insight into Laos #426

So another emergency leave request from an employee story for you. It seems this employee's husband was following generally accepted driving norms and slowing down to stop at a red light on Friday. What a mistake that was. As he slowed down, two drunks riding a motorbike (without driver's license I might add) decided that stopping was for suckers, or maybe didn't decide anything at all, but in their altered state did not stop.

Instead, they plowed headlong into the back of said husband's car, injuring themselves and breaking their beloved motorbike. Seems a cut and dry case of stupid drunk drivers injuring themselves, their beloved motorbike, and the back of an innocent, law-abiding citizen's car, right?

Oh, the naivete...

Once the police got involved, they all had to gather for some sort of mediation or something. Hey, if there's one thing Laos has in spades it's opportunities for alternative dispute resolution. Anyway, the police listened to what happened, and this was their verdict....

1. Said husband's car insurance must pay for up to two months of medical bills and life maintenance expenses (in case the injured drunkards cannot return to work).

2. Said husband must pay to the injured drunkards 1 million kip (about $100) to pay for motorbike repairs and to pay for a Baci ceremony for the injured drunkards. A Baci is a ceremony for good luck. I guess the police figured that plowing drunkenly into a stopped car on your motorbike has less to do with the amount of Beer Lao you've consumed and more to do with bad luck.

3. Said husband's car was impounded for 4 days. He was told to return today to get his car back. When he did, he was told that he must pay 600,000 kip ($60) for leaving his car at the police station for 4 days. He expressed surprise, and mentioned that he was forced to leave his car at the police station by the same people who were now demanding payment for the right to leave it there. There's logic there somewhere. Said husband said that he would require a receipt, but of course no receipt would be forthcoming. Said husband then said he didn't have the 600,000 kip, at which point the right to be forced to leave your car at the police station for four days went on sale. At 500,000 kip, who can say no?????

So to sum up. If you are obeying traffic laws in Laos and are run into by drunken idiots on a motorbike, be prepared to pay for their hospitalization, their worker's compensation, their bike repair, and their good luck ceremony. It's really the only fair way to equitably deal with such a situation.

Knowing what I know now, I'm off to get drunk and drive a motorbike. Time for me to get PAID!!!!!!