Expatriate weekend extraordinaire

I feel dirty. Very dirty. We have had quite an expatriate weekend. To wit:

Saturday morning expatriate Phil gets up and goes golfing with the guys. 18 holes, including caddy, $15. Expat Phil and his expat friends question why we have male caddies, when usually we have young ladies.

Meanwhile, expat Katherine goes off to do her volunteer work with the children.

Saturday night, on a whim after watching an episode of The Sopranos on DVD that was particularly full of Italian food, expats Katherine and Phil go for a lovely dinner of Italian food at one of the most expensive (okay, now those that have been here know that 'expensive' is relative, and should be taken with a grain of salt) restaurants in town, where we run into the Australian Ambassador and his wife and chat for a while about life in Asia, life in the US, Australia, etc.

This morning, expat Phil goes to the US Ambassador's house and plays tennis in the morning, while expat Katherine relaxes at home.

Next, expats Phil and Katherine get dressed up in their local garb and attend their gardener's daugther's wedding baaci. Of course, expats Phil and Katherine don't know where their gardener lives, so their housekeeper comes over and leads them there on her motorbike. Nice housekeeper, she. Once there, as the father of the bride's employers, expats Phil and Katherine are treated like royalty. "oh no, you should go to the front" "No, it's much too hot at that table, sit here and we will ensure that you have a fan blowing on you." "You have to leave early? Why don't we serve you food before everyone else eats..."

Next, expats Katherine and Phil head off for brunch with friends, followed by an afternoon at the local expat club, swimming and generally enjoying the day, while locals tend to their small garden plots on the riverbanks.

Later, we will go for massages.

I need a shower to wash off the stench of elitism.

Maybe I should hire someone to bathe me.